I love the absurd stories of zen and sufi lore. I want instant enlightenment, don’t you? Here’s a story from Larry Shainberg in his book Ambivalent Zen.
He goes to study at a Japanese monastery with Kyudo Roshi:
When I tell Kyudo Roshi that I am studying to become a monk, a look of disbelief crosses his face. Then he explodes with laughter. “You monk? Larry-san a monk?? Ha ha ha!”
Finally he gains control of himself and fixes me with a stare. “No, Larry-san, you not monk. You INSTANT monk! Understand? Instant monk! Listen: I monk, become monk 6 years old. Four years temple, fifteen years monastery. Why you want to monk?”
Embarassed, I tell him I want to “take my practice to a deeper level.”
“Deeper level?” he laughs again. “What you mean deeper?
Zen practice only one level.
No deep, understand?